He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
