whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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