Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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