I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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