I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
