the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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