i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
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