Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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