bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
