i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Sorry about my life...
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
