ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
