Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Randomize
