I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
True strength comes from lack of pants
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
