Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize