i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
