Three words: puerto rican gang bang
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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