i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
