i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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