i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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