Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
