You work out of a Hotel?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
she pinky promised me she was 18
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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