i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
