one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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