I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
