why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
