but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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