can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
