I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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