Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize