Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize