he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
