Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
