Pappa wants mamma naked
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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