Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize