Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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