I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
