I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
