ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
