I hope mine doesn't look like that
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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