i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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