Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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