I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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