At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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