omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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