no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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