idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize