Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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