no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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