thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
