Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
This is my gift to your gina
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
