Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
